Why A Narcissist Has Committed To Others — But Not You

Spoiler: It's Not About You

Why A Narcissist Has Committed To Others — But Not You

A narcissist commits to one thing in life, and that is the pursuit of narcissistic supply. If you submit fully to the narcissist with no strings attached, providing attention, service, sex, adulation, mirroring and selfless cooperation, then you will be in their good favour.

Yet no strings attached is the key to this arrangement. If you frustrate the narcissist with your needs or demands, then they will pull away and invest in someone more useful. You must be wholly subservient to their need for narcissistic supply. Everything else is secondary, including you.

There is one minor exception. If it ensures ongoing narcissistic supply for the narcissist, then they will reluctantly ‘compromise’ to give you what you need — yet with harsh limits.

They Love Me, They Love Me Not

During the initial idealisation phase, the narcissist is wholly available and eager to get to know you. This quickly wanes, however. The narcissist may continue to make some effort, but never qui...

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